Grace

We sang what is possibly my all-time favorite anthem at church today: Were it Not for Grace. I wish I could get a recording of it, but since I don't know how I thought I'd leave the lyrics up here. I find them pretty comforting; maybe you'll get something as well.

Time measured out my days. Life carried me along.
In my soul I yearned to follow God but knew I'd never be so strong.
I looked hard at this world to learn how Heaven could be gained
just to end where I began where human effort is all in vain.
Were it not for Grace, I can tell you where I'd be:
wandering down some pointless road to nowhere with my salvation up to me.
I know how that would go, the battles I would face
forever running, but losing the race
were it not for Grace.
So here is all my praise expressed with all my heart
offered to the friend who took my place and ran the course I couldn't even start.
And when he saw in full just how much his love would cost
he still went the final mile between me and Heaven so I would not be lost.
Were it not for Grace, I can tell you where I'd be:
wandering down some pointless road to nowhere with my salvation up to me.
I know how that would go, the battles I would face
forever running, but losing the race
were it not for Grace.

Victory (Part II)

I got into college today. Or rather, I got into college and university today. This is exciting on a number of levels, most prominently the level that includes me not going to Surry Community College next year. Nothing against the place, I was just hoping for something a little farther away from home.
Davidson and Carolina sent me their letters this morning (Davidson actually sent an academic catalog two days ago without explanation) and Carolina has already given me an email address. I think I'm gonna get a Facebook with my Carolina acccount just for giggles.
So the decision process begins. My initial desire was to get the Morehead so I someone would make the college decision for me, but since those blasted heels didn't cooperate I guess it's time for some soul searching. A lot of people I talk to know exactly where they want to go; I envy those people. Adding to the confusion is the money situation, which though not that big a deal is still in the back of my mind. Speaking of which, I'm a finalist for the Armfield scholarship (that letter came this morning, too; it's been a good mail day for me).
The next two weeks or so should probably bring word of any scholarships and therefore bring the moment of truth/decision for me. Your proyers would be appreciated.

Victory

It rained for the second straight day today, postponing our match with Elkin and giving me a rare oppurtunity to get in some errands I had been meaning to run. The most notable of these was not so much an errand at all, but rather an oppurtunity.
William John and I have been saying that we would play raquetball since the middle of the last swim season, but with tennis and such we never got around to it. Today I finally caught up with the wily critter, and boy was it ever satisfying.
For the record, William has never held a raquetball raquet in his life; this was his first go-round. But nevertheless, I am really really pumped to have won. I don't care how long I've been playing or how little he knew about the rules: I handed a racket and a ball to William John and came away victorious. Today is National Dance Day, so in honor of this and my victory I will take this oppurtunity to do a little jig.
Ryan jigs. People scratch their heads and look bemused.
Ok, that was a mistake; I'm still a little sore, I probably should've stretched first. Though my butt now hurts, it throbs with the tenderness of triumph. Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take a long, hot bath.

No Deal

I'm watching Deal or No Deal on NBC right now, a show I've hated from the beginning because it got picked up for another season at the exact time that The West Wing was canceled. The show features the simplest format I've ever encountered, even cheaper than Who Wants to be a Millionaire. Each contestant picks a briefcase from a selection of twenty five or so, and inside that briefcase is an amount of money, ranging from a single penney to a million dollars. The contestant then has to open the other briefcases to see which prizes he did not recieve. Along the way, a phantom banker offers the contestant a modest amount of money to stop playing, so about once every couple of minutes the contestant has to decided "deal or no deal."
It's compelling television, I'm not gonna lie. For a statistics geek like me, it's fun to calculate the expected value and see whether or not the contestant is making the right decision. And the pressure is incredible. The dude that was on tonight almost cried.
The banker's offers generally increase as time goes on, rewarding the contestants for sticking around and therfore creating a more exciting show. Tonight, our poor contestant decided to deal at the worst possible time, had he decided to quit one case earlier or later he would have gone away with almost $100,000 more. You really feel bad for the guy.
And then you think, "Wait, he just got $100,000 for standing on television. Who cares if his case held half a million? He's still going away $100,000 richer!" I'm actually a little mad; what other country in the world could make winning $100,000 a disappointment?
I wonder what our kids will think thirty years from now about what we thought was entertaining. I think they'll regard Who Wants to be a Millionaire and Deal or No Deal much as we regard the Gong Show and Laugh In: quaint and funny but indicative of some troubling cultural defect. And that's just the game shows; will future generations understand the ever-present reality tv craze? Do we even understand reality tv?
I remember being really disappointed with my mom when she got hooked on Survivor back in its first season. I thought she had sunk to the lowest depths of cultural gratification (I might have even used those words, though I was in sixth grade so I doubt I knew what they meant at the time.) She immersed herself in the show, its contestants, its rules, strategies and pitfalls, and before long she had me hooked too. So I worry that when my parents watch Deal or No Deal I might fall into the trap the way I fell into Survivor. What bothers me so much about the show? Is it because the particpants attitude toward the cash comes off as idol worship, or that Howie Mandel is so annoying? Is it something else? And then I marvel at my attitude toward the show; why does a person who likes South Park find shows like Deal or No Deal morally repugnant? How did I get so pompous, so self-righteous?
I am, by nature, a worrier, and there are so many conflicts flying around in my head right now that I have little time to muse on the cultural and spiritual significance of shows like Deal or No Deal. So I'll leave the thinking to you. Do you have any idea what bothers me so much about this? If you have any thoughts, do let me know; I could use a little resolution right now.

Notes from the Inside

I tend to forget things very quickly, so I thought I'd share a few notes on my weekend in the enemy's territory.
This is a big university, but that doesn't mean it's not a small world. So far, I've run into Mackenzie Sumner (at a baseball game) and Bo Caudle (in a class); neither of them has noticed me and I never felt the need to say hello. I did, however, tell the people around them little tidbits about thier lives in Mount Airy, just in case they ever wanted to play mind games or something.
Carolina has, by far, the best cafeteria food of any institution I've ever been to. This is helpful, because they've treated us to many high class, fancy schmancy dinners and banquets this weekend and I've needed a little grease to keep my stomach in place.
It's no fun watching a game with people who are too into it. My personal issues with UNC aside, watching the Duke/Carolina game was annoying because the students were so loud I couldn't hear the commentary and jumped up and high-fived each other after every, EVERY UNC basket. I couldn't even see half the time. After the game ended, I reluctantly joined my colleagues on Franklin Street. I saw people climbing on poles, a huge bonfire (as well as five or six just regular-sized fires), but the most distinctive sight was a circle of people playing African drums. The party wasn't too much to my taste, but my roomate stayed out until three in the morning (in fact, I met him for the first time as he came in from that celebration.)
I went to University Baptist Church (I passed on Aunt Anne's beloved Binkley out of neccesity) yesterday. The service was interesting; their pastor also rushed Franklin Street the night before and was by no means an orthodox preacher. Their pastor was a member of the Morehead selection comittee for eight years or so, which makes me wonder about some of the people on who still are involved.
Two days of gorgeous weather ended this morning, and I awoke on the day of my interviews to find a dreary, rainy day. Despite the bad omens and such, the interviews went well (I think; I hope.)
I met up with Andy Pennock, a teacher from GSE, after lunch today and spent about an hour with him. It's good to catch up with friends, even if you don't really have much to talk about. He set me up with a friend (who was a guest speaker at GSE) who was teaching a class entitled Religion and Sociology. I enjoyed the class; the 32 page reading assignment was less entertaining.
That's all for now. I'll probably drop a few more notes after dinner tonight.